Soviet Political Anecdotes from the 1920s
Soviet Political Anecdotes from the 1920s
An elderly man, distressed with Soviet conditions, utters the mournful sigh, "Oi!" on a tramcar. His wife hushes him and says,"Abram, how many times did I tell you not to talk counter-revolution in public!"
And as a comment on the continuing failure of the Comintern, a lifetime job is advertised: to climb to the top of Ivan’s bell tower in the Kremlin and watch out for the dawn of the world revolution.
A student of aristocratic origins, who has been guilty of Menshevism in the past, is questioned for entrance into the university.
-"What are your social origins?"
-"The same as Lenin’s."
-"What side were you on before the October revolution?"
-"The same as Trotsky."
Question: Can a snake break its own spine?
Answer: Only if it slithers along the General Line.
To a question in a questionaire, "Did you waver in carrying out the General Line of the party?"
Answer: "I wavered along with the General Line."
Q: Why has Trotsky been exiled?
A: Our country is obliged to export all its best products.
Trotsky is fishing in Turkish exile. Local newsboy wishes to pull his leg. "Extra! Extra! Stalin is dead!"
Trotsky: "Young man, if Stalin were dead, I should be in Moscow."
Newsboy tries again the next day. "Extra! Extra! Lenin is alive!"
Trotsky: "Young man, if Lenin were alive, he would be here with us."
Is it possible to build socialism in one country? Stalin sends for a famed rabbi famed for wisdom. The rabbi asks to consult Talmud and other texts. In a few days, comes the answer, "Well?" asks Stalin.
A: "Yes, it is possible to build socialism in one country. But to live in that country -- that's impossible."
Q: How are things?
A: Better than tomorrow.
Q: How are things?
A: Like Lenin, in his mausoleum.
Q: Why?
A: Because they neither feed us nor bury us.
Citizen is to be shot for counter-revolution. Any last requests? "Just one. I want to become a Communist before I die." Astonished,they ask why. "If I become a communist, there will be at least one less scoundrel in the world."
